The Curse of Shaun T’s Insanity…

I’ve been hexed.

I’ll be the first to admit I’m not really “in to” exercise – you only get an arse like this from sitting on it – but believe it or not I used to dance…



I stopped before my last year of school because of my A Levels and not being able to have the time off to go to competitions, and instead taught and choreographed at my local youth stage school. Aside from that I’ve done no exercise at all for the past 12 months.

On a day to day basis, I could pass as the human embodiment of a sloth, but when it comes to getting fit I’m an all in kind of person. It’s a side effect of being on top form for the first 16 years of your life.

So of course I chose Insanity, which if you didn’t know is a hardcore exercise DVD which features Shaun T, a renowned fitness trainer.

I have never made it past the first 2 weeks.

The first time I started getting insanely (he he) lethargic and ended up in bed for 10 days with flu.

The second time my stomach started hurting. I thought it was from the exercise…

…I had my appendix out a week later.

The third time I got shin splints in both legs and irritated my eight times dislocated patella so much I could barely walk.

I think it’s a sign. My life is destined to be me sitting on the internet and eating crisps.

Maybe I shouldn’t have signed up for those university cheerleading sessions…

P.S. It was the before and after pictures that sucked me in…apparently you have to exercise for 2 months for those…no chance. I’m more of a *does exercise* *sleeps* *wakes up* *am I thin yet?* kinda gal.

And I would walk five hundred miles…

And I would walk five hundred more…*sings obnoxiously in hideously inaccurate Scottish accent*

If there was a memo, I’ve missed it. I don’t understand.

The practise seemed even more prevalent in Laredo…

Since I’ve been here I’ve noticed that its a “thing” for three quarters of the beach population to walk, nay stride, purposely up and down the length of the beach, back and forth, like ants carrying food to their nest under the watchful eye of their queen…ok where exactly do I think I’m going with this?

I don’t now if its just me, but it all seems a little bit strange… When I, for one, am on the beach, I…well…beach myself, like a whale…in the optimum “sunbathing position”…basting in Hawaiian Tropic. I refuse to move other than to lightly toast (read: burn) my other side or if I near mummify from dehydration (naughty, don’t actually do this).

I’m starting to think this is the reason why google didn’t bother mapping Lidls in Laredo, or any of the supermarkets for that matter (I’m totally over it….totally…), it would have been too hard to photoshop out all of the “ants” obscuring the view.

Out of pure curiosity, I decided to partake in this bizarre activity, and have concluded that it looks suspiciously like exercise…

Am I skinny yet?

P.S. Do you “walk the walk”? If so, why? It it just for the lols, the exercise *shudder* or is there a secret underground practise I don’t know about ‘coz I’m English?

P.P.S. My “research” walk along Benicassim beach was actually quite pleasant. I would have done it again but that’s my monthly exercise quota all used up…